It’s A Wonderful World

Good evening, Dear Reader! I’m trying something new…posting in the evening for a bit, to see if that changes the stats. I’m all about those stats, you know. (Wink. Wink. I don’t give a shit about stats.)

We are in the beginning stages of ‘Fall’ here in the Ozarks, and I could not be more thrilled. I find it offensive that Dunkin’ Donuts has ‘cold brew pumpkin spice’ on the menu. Pumpkin-Spice-Anything ain’t supposed to be served cold. Are you pickin’ up what I’m puttin’ down, Dawg? Hand me a hot PS latte with cinnamon sprinkles, and leave me alone with a book. Please.

Nonetheless, it isn’t entirely freezing, so my body and soul are pleased. Remember, I only like the weather when it’s between 45 and 75 degrees. Anything outside that range makes me grumpy.

That said, I seem to be evolving a bit since moving into my tiny home, and it got me thinking this might be a good blog post for you folks. So, since Target seems to be marketing Hallo-Thanks-Mas as all one big long holiday, here are my quick tips (before we get into the good stuff) for not going into debt in the next 85 days: 

1) Don’t buy shit you don’t need.
2) Don’t buy them shit they don’t need.
3) Don’t tell kids there’s a Santa when you are the one who worked your ass off all year to buy that Nintendo.

There. A Simple Holiday Summation by Denise. Boom.

Now…about that evolutionary thing I mentioned before. 

Grab a drink and settle in. I think you might like this.

I’ve been happy for nearly an entire year. I know, right? The last nine years have been challenging to say the least, but around this time last year, I started waking up to the fact that some things were not working in my life and clearly, I was the only one who was going to change that. So, as I wrote in this post last week, I set out to make some changes and here we are, a year later. So. Um. Yes. {Cracks knuckles}:  I am full of joy. 

If you don’t know me personally or have just recently started reading my creepy online diary you may not realize the significance of this. But let’s just say…it’s been years – years – since I felt the way I felt true joy. 

What did I do to achieve 98% bliss? So. Many. Little. Things. Which all, in turn, helped me evolve into the person I want to be. I’m still making some tweaks here and there, picking up some interests, and dumping things that no longer serve me, but yeah. Finally, things are good.

Here are my takeaways from the last few years. I hope they speak to you in some way:

1) Don’t get too attached to an outcome. I’m tenacious. I’ve got ‘grit’. I believe in myself. I will keep trying long after something has served me. But over the last year, I learned that it is okay to get to the top of a mountain (i.e., achieve a goal) and think, “Hmmm. That’s pretty, but it isn’t spectacular.” Instead of being frustrated by the wasted time and energy, be grateful for the opportunity to learn. That doesn’t lessen the experience.

2) Be okay with saying you aren’t okay. In October 2020, I started posting videos via Facebook urging people to reach out to their friends and shed some light on mental unwellness. People were feeling the impact of COVID fatigue at that point, and no one was paying any attention. I was, essentially, telling people I wasn’t doing so hot myself, and it was okay to admit it. The videos are gone, as is the Facebook page (at least I hope so), but the message is still essential. (On that note: Call someone today. This is the time of year when people act like they are okay but then wind up taking enough Klonopin to kill men half their size. Do not text them. Call them. {Steps off the soapbox}).

3) Find a community of like-minded people. Whether you want to learn outdoor survival skills, want to make lifestyle changes, or find yourself facing the death of a loved one, there is a lot to be said about finding a support group. Support groups aren’t just for those who are suffering, though. I joined many online car-camping groups and felt supported by the members. I know I can reach out at any time. I even slept in a stranger’s driveway when I traveled to Minnesota this summer that I ‘met’ in a FB group called “Roadtrip Her.” While some of my close in-person friends are like, “You wanna what?” these crazy-ass car campers are like, “You go, Girl! That bed looks awesome!” and “Don’t forget the bear spray!” 

4) Put yourself out there. Helping others is the best thing you can do for yourself so put yourself out there. Read to a little kidTake food to older adults. Sign up to do taxes for the low-to-middle income folks in your communityBe a designated driver. I don’t care; just do something that takes the focus off yourself and your sad little life (I say that in love.) I volunteer at my son’s school. I give money to class projects. I do ‘data clean up’ for an organization in Delaware late at night. I love organizing sock drives and watching kids’ eyes light up at book fairs. I like clean data. I enjoy the feeling I get when I help kids go on field trips when I know their parents struggle to buy groceries (Ahem, I was one of those parents not so long ago). Volunteering leaves little time for you to think only of yourself.

5) Choose the right tribe. I wrote about my tribe last year in this post but it’s important to remember that your tribe doesn’t have to be big to be mighty. Additionally, if your status is “in a relationship”, remember this nugget: The partner you choose for your journey makes all the difference in the world. I’ve been married twice, and I can tell you this: I have never in my entire life felt so unsupported as I did in both marriages. We all need folks in our lives who support us, believe in us, and know when to kick us in the ass if we need it. Spend time with the people who straighten your crown, not those who tell you that dress would look better if you lost ten pounds. Do not spend one more minute with anyone who doesn’t even really like you.

So, in summary, evolution isn’t always pleasant, but it is always worth it. As is my nature, I’m leaving you with this little ol’ song, because if you really look around, the world is a beautiful place – you just gotta change the view occasionally. 

PS…If you liked this and thought others might, too, feel free to share on all the social thingamajigs.

2 thoughts on “It’s A Wonderful World

Comments are closed.